I am going to pretend that didn’t happen and go home now. I am going to pretend that you just didn’t screw my life over royally, and have things happen that I can no longer change from my present. When we talked you looked in my eye’s like you had truly cared. I was so very wrong. How do I stop the hurt.??? It had been years since I had let someone in my heart. I let you in and you rip my heart out and jump all over me and my heart.

I am going to try to pretend that we didn’t connect in a way that felt real to me. This emptiness is truly killing me. You are in my head all the time, just like you are deceased and not just away. Contrary to what you may think, this was not the outcome that I would have chosen. Why did u choose me.?? Why did you break my heart into a billion pieces.???

Here I am, things are going better. You came and went in my life just when things were beginning to turn around in my life. I got my own place now. However, almost lost it all from beginning to end. Every single day of my life, my heart hurts. Took 9 years to stop the pain from my ex, just as I got the needed closure you walk in and rip it back apart.

You must remain unnamed because seeing your name in black and white opens the wounds. You cried to me and I cried to you, yet it meant absolutely nothing to you and here I am, trying to figure out these blank spaces. I want to fill them with the happiness I have received and deserve. Just have to figure out how to let you go.

Till then…this remains unfinished and you remain Anonymous.

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